TheBanyanTree: Dee

[Julie Anna Teague]

Quoting TLW <tlwagener at gmail.com>:

> I also remember Dee in the very early days.  I'm talking about the
> NOSH.  A Campfire -- Julie?  Remember?  Brrrghghgh.

The back story.  Yup, yes, and you captured it exactly.  Tim had a 
ringside seat at the dissolution of my horribly dysfunctional marriage, 
and he booed and hissed at me, publicly and privately through the whole 
thing. From where he sat, not knowing a thing about me or my life, he 
judged me to be slime.  That was fun, because when one is contemplating 
one's options--divorce or suicide--it's nice to have people weighing in 
on both sides. <jk>   He enjoyed finding someone's weakness and 
attacking, and by God, all of us being human and all, we each HAD a 
weakness.  It was just a matter of finding it, and what better medium 
for finding it than a place that was supposedly for "journaling and 
self expression".

I wanted this to be about Dee, though, and this is why it is about Dee: 
because Dee had the same ringside seat at the same scary-clown-circus 
chapter of my life, but she showed me nothing but compassion and 
friendship and counseled me with wisdom and humor.  She was a gift.  
Finding Dee, Wes, Youngblood, and Terry, on that story group was one of 
the best things that ever happened in my life.  After most of us 
started running, screaming, from the campfire, Dee stayed and threw her 
selfless little self into damage control on behalf of several of us.  
Terry Hinely, one of the world's brighter lights, had even left, 
disgusted, by that time.  Terry, who lit up that other place like a 
full moon, who had regaled us around a real campfire on some cold 
nights in Durango, was never mentioned on that other list when he died 
so tragically, never once honored in the place he'd given so much time 
and creative energy to, and that was the last straw, I think, for Dee.  
The evil one had thrown off the last vestiges of being a human being 
and even our Dee gave up on him.  To complete that part of the story: I 
think Wes told me that he died of cancer a few years back.  I have to 
wonder if anyone had good words for him.  I honestly hope someone did.

How fortunate we are to have had each other in our lives for so many, 
many years.  It never seems like enough when we lose one of our beloved 
friends, but what a surge of gratitude I'm feeling right now to have 
had her laughter and light all this time.  And what a surge of 
gratitude I'm feeling to have ALL OF YOU in my life.  Group hug, 
everyone.

Julie



















> It was "run" by a fellow who was -- in a word -- CA-RAZY.  He
> occasionally had sort of, um, fits.  Random fits.  And I learned soon
> enough that when these fits hurtled into the campfire circle, the
> members would scatter and lay low, days would pass, and then someone
> would poke their head out and post again.  Nothing would be said about
> the insanity.  A fine dysfunctional family, eh?  Hoooo-ey!
>
> Dee and Tobie joined at about the same time.  Dee and I bonded right
> away (I posted a lot more often then) through our humor and -- okay,
> our own brand of craziness.  Just a month or two after Dee came on
> board, the leader went into another rage, only THIS time, *I* was the
> target.  I had written a play about a pathological liar, and written a
> film that did not have my name in the credits (I withdrew from the
> arbitration, long story.  short story: viper pit), and somehow he got
> it into his head that I WAS a pathological liar, did not write the
> film, and was quite simply not who I was pretending to be.  He got
> really surly and arrogant and mean, in public, to me, kicked me out,
> and everyone... scattered.
>
> Dee, in her way, perhaps in her naive newbie way, wrote the guy
> offline.  For days.  And engaged him in a rational dialogue (as if)
> and defended me, quoting me, asking why he was after me, what did he
> possibly hope to achieve, and what was the deal, anyway?
>
> The group sort of splintered about this time, into (at least) two
> circles.  Subsequently, Julie and Wes took up the torch and invented
> The Spoon.  Thanks Gods.
>
> Anyway, Dee kept me apprised of the correspondence between her and...
> Tim?  Was it Tim?  Julie?  She sent me their exchanges, hers being
> rational and adorable and funny, and his being... Tim.  Or
> whatsitswhoeverthinger.  I was so moved, I can't even tell you  --
> perhaps because I so often am a whistle-blower or "golden thorn"
> (Mental eye roll, you'd think I'd learn, but I despise bullies with
> all my blood) and no one ever steps forward to defend me.  Then later,
> they say, "Oh, I totally thought you were awesome back there!"
>
> Anyway, this isn't about me.  No, really.  It's about a brave and
> intelligent writer woman who took on the Head Guy when he got wonky
> and mean.  It meant the world to me, and still does.
>
> Dee claimed my heart during those dark days as the Campfire fell
> apart.  She has it still, and will have it forever.
>
> xoxoSidda
>