TheBanyanTree: Legendary

[Maria Gibson]

I am in love with a bartender.  He is a card carrying, cigar chomping, 
mean-as-hell curmudgeon.  Just in case you thought the curmudgeon was 
extinct, I promise you, I know where one is.  I don't know if he's the 
last one but he's mine (you know, for all intents and purposes) and I 
love him.  I almost feel as if I'm recounting meeting Big Foot or 
something.  Jake is like a huge bear.  A huge, smelly bear covered in 
burs and thorns.  And mud, there's mud on him, too.  And flies follow 
him around but always at a safe distance.  This guy is great.  Did I 
mention my adoration...?

Jake used to be a doctor but has retired and the bar is his way 
(according to his pals, not the brute himself) of keeping off the 
streets.  He curses at folks, complains about having to make drinks when 
he has to tend bar and shouts insults at his customers.  You know he 
loves you right back when he is shouting at you because he always has 
the biggest grin.  I can barely get near him because he knows now he is 
in for a hug if he allows me to get within range.  If I can catch him, 
I'll hug him up and clutch him tight to my bosom all while he complains 
in my ear about being gripped.   I think he doesn't mind as much as he 
complains.

This is the place where I go and someone shouts my name.  Or, if Jake is 
busy and doesn't see me, he shouts my name when he sees me.  Either way, 
it is the place where they know my name and like to see me walk in.  My 
Bud Light is waiting for me by the time I make it to the bar and I can 
sit and watch sports or whatever is on tv or I can play pool by myself.  
No one bothers me and I bother no one.  Don't get me wrong, plenty of 
folks to talk to when that's what I want.  Have even found a few other 
sucks to play pool with me from time to time.  No matter how badly they 
play, though, I play worse.

If you're ever in town, I'll take you to see my curmudgeon.  We won't 
tell him we're on an expedition, of course.  We'll cut up, he'll crack 
me up, I'll tell him too often that I adore his silly self.  He'll wave 
me off like I don't matter but if I ignore him, he'll be over to poke me 
awake just to be sure I'm still paying attention.  I promise you, you'll 
go away loving this one.


Just for heaven's sake, whatever you do, don't stick your fingers 
through the bars.....

Maria