TheBanyanTree: The Schizophrenia Diaries

[Monique]

February 15, 2004

The thing is, I can't remarry unless I'm divorced. Officially, I mean. Not
that there are any offers, don't get me wrong. There isn't anyone on the
horizon, nor is anything expected for, oh, at least a few months, possibly
longer. Possibly much longer. Still, being married while not being married
would greatly interfere with the entire remarriage process should that
become an issue. 

Then there are the other considerations. Once the disability runs out, he'll
need state aid. (Unless I become wealthy very quickly, in which case I'm
more than happy to support him.) 

Filing for divorce is something we just haven't gotten around to; it became
a non-issue. We knew where we were, we agreed, it's just paperwork. The
packet has been sitting in my living room for a very long time, just waiting
for us to actually fill it out. There's nothing for us to not agree on . . .
we're quite amenable, each ready to take over the other's debts, willing to
keep supporting each other if necessary, whatever it takes.

But it is one of those things that eventually must be dealt with, so tonight
I picked up the packet while we watched Sports Night on DVD, and began
attempting to fill out the forms.

Obtaining a divorce is not an easy process. Fill this out, fill that out,
agree to this, agree to that. Then do that another ten times. File here,
file there. Why can't we go to court, say, "Hey, we're divorcing, he's
schizophrenic, I can't be a caretaker and a wife at the same time," and have
it over with?

I see inside the packet that there's a free divorce workshop every other
Friday. I ask Stew if he'd like to go, since it's free.

He says sure, he can do that. (I figure I can send him, then I won't have to
miss work.) (Well, he is high functioning.) 

I tell him it's not a big deal, just since it's free . . . and I don't want
to do anything wrong. 

Then I thought about it. "But what's the worst that can happen?" I ask. "We
have to stay married?"

And then we can't stop laughing.


Monique