TheBanyanTree: Home theatre poem

[JMoney]

It started with the tape of Babe,
A tape we'd hardly used,
But pressing play led to dismay.
The picture was all skewed.

The colour flicked to monotone
And back; it drove me nuts.
I thought, "These faults I won't condone.
It's time we graded up."

His birthday was in just a month.
A cunning thought I had.
I'll buy the DVD I want,
And then we'll all be glad.

Off to the shops I dragged a son
And round the course we plied,
To here and there and back again,
In search of the best buy.

So many features, brands galore
And mystery acronyms.
I couldn't tell if less was more,
Or less, or inbetween.

At last a young man showed a set
That wasn't cheap at all,
But promised that we could eject
One set that worked no more.

Humidity, or maybe bugs,
Had had their merry way.
Our CD could've been unplugged
For all the sound it played.

The new set offered everything
A couch potato needs.
My lust was touched, my heart did sing.
I'll have that set, I said.

So home with us the system came
And stayed pristine, unpacked
Within its box, till we replaced
The place where it would stand.

A chipboard thing we've had for years.
I wouldn't mind its age,
But for the chips a chipboard leaks
When damp has had its way.

Back to the shops I dragged the son.
Again we made the rounds.
It turned into a weekend run
With lots of grumbling sounds.

There was a unit I desired,
Tasmanian Oak, they said,
But at the back chipboard I spied.
There's no rocks in my head.

I kept on looking, drove men mad,
A saga it became
Of disappointment, feeling bad,
Until last weekend's sale.

All pine it is; on casters too.
Two hundred dollars off.
The dinky leadlights, they will do,
But best of all, in stock.

So Monday I pulled out the old.
Disgusting, what I saw.
Dirt, chips and cobwebs (but no mould).
I cleaned the walls and floor.

On Tuesday the new unit came.
The box at last was breached.
I set each piece in its own place
And joined them each to each,

And got a picture but no sound.
Depression settled in.
Today I've done the phone book round
Determined that we'll win.

I've found a man who seems to know
How cables should be linked
And if the outcome should be woe,
I'll take back that damn thing.

Janice