TheBanyanTree: Heartstone

[LaLinda]

Tobie Helene Shapiro, I did try to lick you on Facebook, but I couldn't
find you, I guess you'll have to friend request me.

On Thu, Feb 3, 2022 at 2:28 PM tobie--- via TheBanyanTree <
thebanyantree at lists.remsset.com> wrote:

> Oh Laura!
>
>         You are not, absolutely not, alone. Having no voice as a child,
> that institutionalized impotence. Who would believe you? And then there’s
> the fear of destroying what little stability you have. That stability is a
> chimera of course. It’s just that we knew the suffering. A known substance,
> even horrible, provides some kind of anchor. Terrible terrible to have only
> abuse to lean on as a given. Each time: well, the world did not come apart.
> I’m still alive. There is a routine, and food in the fridge. Better shut
> up.  Why do we know to keep these secrets?
>
>         My mantra growing up (if that’s what I did) was, "I will never
> turn into that. I will keep my heart loving and warm." That didn’t mean my
> heart was open. Too dangerous. That you survived all that is miraculous. I
> hear the insistence of the wounds inflicted. Over the years I’ve read what
> you write and I can’t believe that you’re all so hardened and dark at the
> center as you think. It’s just that the softer the center, the harder the
> carapace must be to protect it. You say you have your partner who loves you
> and has never betrayed you. He must see you clearly, more clearly than you
> see yourself. Trust his vision. You still shine through — bright, honest,
> kind.
>
> Tobie
>
>
> > On Feb 3, 2022, at 9:24 AM, dale.m.parish--- via TheBanyanTree <
> thebanyantree at lists.remsset.com> wrote:
> >
> > Laura rote:
> >> The day I spent hours trying to do something to make my father happy,
> to get him to do something besides humiliate me, to notice me, to praise my
> efforts.
> >
> > Until my mother came to me and told me she was divorcing my father
> because of his alcoholism, I couldn't understand it, either.  It finally
> dawned on me that it was his problem, and not really mine.  But it took
> years to really internalize it and get over it.
> >
> > That took guts, Laura.  Thanks for sharing, reminding us.
> >
> > Hugs,
> > Dale
> > --
> > Dale M. Parish                        For All Of Mankind'S Supposed
> Accomplishments,
> > 628 Parish RD                 Our Continued Existence Is Dependent Upon
> 20
> > Orange TX 77632-0264          Centimeters Of Topsoil And The Fact That
> It Rains.
> > Dale.M.Parish at gmail.com                       --Toilet Stall Wall
> > 409-790-2352
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > Need to change your name, email address, or password? Or have you
> forgotten your password? Go here:
> http://lists.remsset.com/listinfo.cgi/thebanyantree-remsset.com
>
> Please lick me on Facebook              THS 2016
>
>
>
> Tobie Shapiro
> mailto:tobie at shpilchas.net <mailto:tobie at shpilchas.net>
>
> Need to change your name, email address, or password? Or have you
> forgotten your password? Go here:
> http://lists.remsset.com/listinfo.cgi/thebanyantree-remsset.com



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