TheBanyanTree: The Zombie Catherine

[Gail Richards]

Yours are the first zombies in quite a while that (who?) haven't bored me to 
death!!!

-----Original Message----- 
From: Monique Colver
Sent: Thursday, December 19, 2013 10:52 AM
To: Banyan Tree
Subject: TheBanyanTree: The Zombie Catherine

(The occasional piece about the ZC)

The Zombie Catherine wiped what could have been oozing brain matter off her
chin and (but was really oatmeal) and prepared to go shopping, first by
putting on clean tattered clothes and then by mussing her hair, just a bit.
She didn't want to give the appearance she was fully alive, after all,
since it confused people. So many whispers, and stares, and floating
remarks, "Look, is that a zombie, or what?" Best to not leave any doubt.
Still, even zombies have some self respect. Not much, but some.

The Zombie Catherine (which she used as her name so as not to confuse
herself with Catherine, the non-zombie) wasn't particularly fond of
Christmas. It brought up memories of her parents, non-zombies who had
raised their children with all the traditional trappings of Christmas,
including tinsel and a deluge of cookies and sweets, which the Zombie
Catherine blamed for her previously chubby appearance. That had changed, of
course, since zombies rarely get enough to eat, and the weight loss is
substantial once the change starts.

But the children, they loved Christmas. She'd tried to explain that zombies
don't celebrate Christmas, but the Zombie Stephanie and the Zombie Louis
had just looked at her as if she weren't quite human. Which she wasn't, but
that was beside the point.

"But we still get toys, right?" Stephanie had asked, while her head lolled
to the side, ready to fall off should someone shake her vigorously.

"I want more video games," Louis intoned, his expression never changing. It
never did, of course, but the Zombie Catherine knew he really wanted
presents anyway. The lack of visible emotion didn't mean there wasn't any
emotion, it only meant he was a zombie.

And so she had given in, as she always did when it came to the children.
Her well-meant effort to reduce the harm she'd done to her children had
gone awry, and instead she had two spoiled brat zombies. And they were
still zombies, no matter how much she spoiled them or let them play Grand
Theft Auto.


M