TheBanyanTree: Fall

[Laura]

On 23 Sep 2011 at 10:50, Monique Colver wrote:

> When you take on responsibility for everything
> and assume the world needs you running it, controlling it even, you can
> quickly find out that the world doesnTMt really care, and that if you drop
> out of it for a bit the world will do just fine, thank you very much.


Such a wonderful thing to finally learn.  I learned it not all that long ago.  It made it so much 
easier to say "NO."  I learned I wasn't irreplaceable in my job, and that when someone says, 
"but you're the only one who can do it", what they really mean is, "you're the only one I know 
of who can do it, and I don't want to take the time and energy to look for someone else, so 
instead I'll try to guilt YOU into doing it".

I can say "NO" very easily now.  Unfortunately, I let myself get suckered/flattered into 
agreeing to do something towards which my first gut response was "NO". Now I'm having a 
not so fun time doing it, and sure enough I got dumped on after saying I'll do it if... and they 
agreed, only the 'if' part hasn't materialized.  I complained yesterday, and maybe I'll get 
some of my conditions filled, but only if i keep fussing.

So, I've lifted myself out of the guilt zone, and decided I will do the very best I can with what 
I've got, and if it doesn't turn out the way they wanted, tough.  And when/if they ask me to 
do it again, I will not be flattered out of my "NO". They will manage just fine with out me, 
thank you very much.

--
Laura
wolfljsh at gmail.com
http://wolfsinger.wordpress.com