TheBanyanTree: 3000 Friends

[auntie sash]

Excellent!

I have images of hitting the 'shuffle' button and having the ifriends come
up in random order.  You could hit the fast forward key if you just weren't
in the mood.  Every now and then you would say "how did HE get in there?"
but you probably wouldn't bother to delete him. I would think of them as my
"Cats in the Cradle" ifriends.  (How DID I get Cats in the Cradle on my Ipod
anyway??)

Very funny, 'Neeky.

-sash (your NOT imaginary friend - although I'm not sure how I could prove
that.)
On Wed, Oct 1, 2008 at 11:50 AM, Monique Colver <monique.colver at gmail.com>wrote:

> One of my "friends" on Facebook is very excited today. He just got friend
> number 3001, no mean feat in these days of social isolation. Amazing, isn't
> it? Friend 3001? Okay, perhaps friend may not be the correct term here.
> There are friends, and then there are friends. How many of us "friends" is
> he going to invite to his birthday party? All of us, I hope. I do want to
> meet the friends of my friend. Where would he hold such an event? Or will
> he
> forget all about us and instead just focus on a few people he knows in real
> life?
>
> The Internet is a wondrous thing, isn't it? If we're feeling isolated we
> can
> just log on and look at how many friends we have. "Look!" I often exclaim,
> "I have friends! People like me!" Let's forget that some of my "friends"
> are
> people I'm friends with because they wrote a book that I liked, or I met
> them once, or I maybe have never met or spoken to them at all, ever, by
> email or in person. Still, they signed on as my FRIEND! They must like me!
> That, or they just really want their friend count to be up. I'm certainly
> not above that sort of thing.
>
> I think a new term is in order. Perhaps iFriend. These are iFriends. Not on
> this list, of course, since you all know far more about me than you should,
> you're stuck with being a friend friend. But for all those people on social
> networking sites, let's call it what it is. iFriends. iFriends don't get
> invited to my birthday party (December 20th, should I decide to have one),
> unless they're also friends. iFriends don't get frantic phone calls from me
> in the middle of the night when I realize that everything I've done has
> been
> in service to the devil and my psyche's dissolving around me in big
> puddles.
> I save those calls for friends. iFriends don't even get Christmas cards.
> iFriends can be amusing, and they can even be helpful if I have a question
> that one of them may have an answer to. But they don't count for gift
> giving
> occasions, nor do they count when I die and God asks me, "So, did you have
> a
> lot of friends?" I'm not going to tell her, "Sure! I have 7,267 friends!
> You
> can check my Facebook if you don't believe me!" God can see right through
> that. "Aha!" She'll say, "those are IFriends! They don't count!"
>
> Best not to antagonize God on the first day. I have many excellent friends.
> I'm lucky that way. So I don't have a million iFriends. That's okay.
> iFriends are cheap and plentiful. And I bet if I offered incentives I'd get
> more. Prizes. Maybe I should offer potential iFriends prizes. Or iFriend
> stamps. Collect them all. I'll have to give this some more thought.
>
> Monique
>



-- 
Live to the point of tears.
- Albert Camus