TheBanyanTree: Gestation

[maria gibson]

It's been nearly nine months since moving into an apartment.  The one I'm in
now isn't the same as the one I originally moved into but neither am I the
same person who made the move.  Seems like such a long story for such a
relatively short period of time; now isn't the time for the telling and that
time may never come for wide audience consumption.

I am more the me I always was than the me I've been for a very long time.
Every ounce of heartache and trouble, each kick to the bladder and bout of
morning sickness has been worth where I am now and what I get to take home.
A new life, albeit one fresh with no idea of what to do next, promises to
grow with nurturing and schooling.  The birthing was relatively short in
comparison to the stages to come next but the promise of improvement shines
brightly.

So, I'm here.  I feel aged to an extent but gratefully also feel wiser.
Took the plunge for an internet connection straight into my own little space
which comes just in time for room in my heart and brain for writing again.
It's a little hard to do that when your pieces and parts are scattered about
the four corners of your mind and it seems even the magnetic force of the
earth could never be able to pull them back together.  It's frightening to
be in the middle of that but great to be rounding the bend inside the tunnel
so that light is again visible.

I woke up today and realized I am and have been closer to whole.  It's a
good thing.

Maria