TheBanyanTree: Ain't Sorry a Bit

[maria gibson]

I was born with it.  I have been known to abuse it with too little sleep, up
to all hours with too much alcohol.  Been known to abuse it with the sun,
baking when not actually broiling in oil.  I've stuffed food into it, run it
on empty and not paid attention to the whispers and screams to bring it all
to a halt and then start all over again.  Did some damage along the way
getting rid of some of it.

Still.  My body stays with me.  Built for business if not for speed.

This isn't the prettiest one on earth.  Got wrinkles and sags not usual for
a woman of my age, a tender 42 working into a tender 43.  Atlas worthy
stretch marks, landmarks of sojourns I've taken with babies growing inside
making me bigger and bigger.  Not an abuse this procreation of life but
definitely not free.  Lost another person, not sure who she was but don't
miss her.  She left behind scars from the vicious fight put up to stay but I
did finally manage to throw her ass over the rope and still stay in the
ring.  I never threw in the towel.

It takes some character, I think, to own what is not perfect.  To look in
the mirror and not berate that which probably turns heads around but not
toward.  It takes guts to fight the voices telling me to hide and cover up
and to still walk out with bits and pieces hanging out for the entire world
to see.  Try to walk tall and perhaps not manage the tallest I can be but
contrive to not stoop.  It's not easy but it can be done and I refuse to do
it any other way.  I hope it one day won't be a second thought.

Won't ever be on the cover of a magazine or grace a runway.  Not gonna be
approached by Hugh Hefner with an offer for a bunny tail.  Will probably
live with rolls and pounds and extra all of it for the rest of my life but
it's ok.  I promise it's ok.  Where speed, grace, beauty and svelte will
never reside, stamina, endurance and strength will.

I don't apologize for any of it to anyone for any reason.  It is what it is.

Maria