TheBanyanTree: Gotta love the loonies

[Red Pepper]

Woofess's post about the loonies she works with reminds me of a story 
someone told me recently about her hairdresser. This lady is rather 
large and is an agoraphobic into the bargain. She is a trained 
hairdresser and cuts from home in a little purpose-built salon attached 
to the house she shares with her elderly mother.

Due to the agoraphobia, she doesn't venture out of the house much. She 
does her own manicures, using super-glue to attach the acrylic nails to 
her own nails. Now super-glue is what you would use to re-attach the 
soles of your shoes, so god only knows what her real nails must look 
like now, if they even still exist.

This lady is always well groomed, her clothes are individual but neat, 
her hair is always immaculately coiffed into a grey beehive, and she 
takes the time to apply rather theatrical make-up and silver jewellery. 
Her teeth, however, haven't seen a dentist's tools for many many years, 
so whenever one falls out, she whips out the super-glue and re-attachs 
them herself. I shudder to think of the pain.

Unfortunately, this lady broke her arm quite severely recently when 
trying to take a nap in her salon by resting on two chairs pushed 
together. It took the ambulance guys a little while to get her off the 
floor due to her size, but she was put into hospital for a few days. The 
sad part of the story is that after years of dutifully paying her health 
insurance, she had let it lapse 6 months before the accident occurred. 
Now she can't work and has no income apart from welfare until her arm 
gets better and she can get back to servicing her loyal clients.