TheBanyanTree: The Last Weekend

[Margaret R. Kramer]

This is it – the last weekend in my home of 15 years.  I haven’t been able
to cook this past week.  We’ve been getting by on TV dinners and Subway
sandwiches.  I think it’s a sign that I’ve divorced myself from this home.

Of course, I do have feelings about the house.  It is my first house.  I
remember how excited my ex-husband and I were to move here.  My son made
fast friends with the neighborhood boys.  But as time went on, the
disintegration of my marriage showed in the upkeep of our house.  Neither my
ex nor I could fix things, so repairs went by the wayside.  We were
financially irresponsible and never had any money, so we couldn’t hire
people to make those repairs.  The house was falling into disarray.

But the house rejuvenated itself when Ray moved in with me.  Ray can fix
things and he immediately began making the basic repairs that were so
desperately needed.  The first year Ray was here, we re-did the kitchen and
painted the outside of the house.  We replaced the roof the next year.  Ray
put in wood flooring on the main level.  We replaced the carpeting TWICE!
Ray painted all the rooms.  He built a beautiful deck in the backyard.  He
redid the landscaping in the backyard, too, so what was once our biggest
eyesore – the muddy backyard, became the focal point of the house.  We
eventually bought new appliances – the fridge, the stove, the dishwasher,
and washer and dryer, and the hot water heater.  Of course, we had to buy a
new furnace, but we had the credit to do so.  Ray and I pay our bills.

This house’s biggest eyesore is the driveway.  It really needs to be
replaced.  It’s asphalt and it’s showing its 30 year old age.  But that’s
not my problem anymore.

We’re on the verge of passing this house onto a young family.  They have an
eight year old daughter and a five year old son.  They looked at the house
many times before deciding to make an offer and since they made the offer,
they’ve tromped through here several times with various relatives.  My ex
and I did the same thing.  It’s nice to come and dream and plan.

Ray drives by our new house almost every day.  It looks like the owner has
moved out.  His phone has been disconnected.  Ray requested a walkthrough,
but the guy was out of town and didn’t want a walkthrough when he wasn’t
there.  We’ll have our walkthrough right before closing on Monday and that’s
OK.

Our new house is exciting because it’s something Ray and I are buying
together.  Although I am proud that the mortgage and deed will be in my name
only, it shows I have the financial ability to purchase a nice home on my
own, because Ray isn’t officially divorced yet, and that’s a long sad story,
not because of Ray and his wife, but because of the goofy lawyers handling
this case.  It’s unbelievable how these two lawyers can muck up a simple
little divorce case and have it drag on needlessly for months.

The timing is interesting, because Ray’s divorce hearing is also on Monday,
although he is not attending, but will be available for a conference call,
the day of our closing, and perhaps this will be it, he will be divorced,
and because the divorce is in Wisconsin, we’ll have to wait six months to
marry.  Then we can get everything right and own the house together.  We’ll
see how this plays out on Monday along with everything else.

Ray joked that everything is coming together because we’re finally on our
last roll of toilet paper.  Three years ago, Ray was working at a grocery
store that was going to close.  He brought home boxes and boxes of toilet
paper.  We’ve been gradually using those rolls over the last three years and
now, just before we move out, we’re going to snap the last roll on the
toilet paper holder probably today.

Margaret R. Kramer
margaretkramer at comcast.net

http://www.bpwmn.org
Business and Professional Women of Minnesota

In the spring, at the end of the day, you should smell like dirt.
~Margaret Atwood