TheBanyanTree: looking for a lost friend

[Sharon Mack]

Good luck!  This brought back feelings of when I tracked down my long
lost ½ brother.  I hadn't seen him since I was 15 and I was 55 at the
time.  I found him through a Union list of retired engineers and they
did the same as the University.  I can't tell you the joy when he called
on Christmas Eve.  We talked for 3 hours.  I hope your friend does the
same!
 
Sharon

>>> Julie Anna Teague <jateague at indiana.edu> 5/27/2005 10:30:14 AM >>>

This may strike some of you as creepy and compulsive and something akin
to
stalking.  I assure you, I have no weird motives except to possibly
reconnect
with an old friend.  I wrote a story a few years ago about how a guy I
knew when
I was 15 contacted me, through my father's address, after 25 years. 
And how I
thought it was weird and never responded.  In my defense, I didn't know
they guy
all that well and found it extremely odd that he would write me. I
guess we all
need to find closure sometimes and we do what we can, but...

I am beside myself with excitement, although I am trying to remain calm
enough
to realize that my lost friend might never contact me.  The story: many
years
ago, on Nosh and then on Spoon (I think he was on Spoon, although he
might have
disappeared by then), there was writer from England who I completely
fell in
love with--in a platonic way, but still, big love.  He was articulate
and
hilarious and smart.  We began emailing back and forth, and for awhile
after he
was no longer on a story group, we wrote real, handwritten letters back
and
forth.  They were wonderful, funny letters and pictures and felt
somehow more
real than electrons.  I felt we were real friends.  And then *poof*
nothing.  He
had completed his life as a graduate chemistry student, very
disgruntled with
the whole thing. He was something of a stunt man, flying small planes,
juggling
flame sticks, and doing street performance, and so I was deathly afraid
that
something had happened to him.  I have thought about him ever since,
for years
now.  Several years ago, I wrote to his last known address but was
pretty sure
he was no longer there.  I tried to track him down on the internet,
although his
name is extremely common, and so that was not working at all.  

I had put it aside for a couple of years now, although things would
come up
which still reminded me of him from time to time.  I can't say exactly
why he
has stuck in my head as he has.  I've dropped aquaintances and friends
like hot
potatoes when the situation allowed.  I'm not a great clinger-on to the
past.
The other day, though, I was inspired (driven? creepy?) to give it one
more
chance.  I happened upon an old email from him and was nearly brought
to tears
with missing his brand of humor and warmth.  I found that his
University had put
up an alumni website with contact info for the alumni office.  They
also put up
lists of lost alumni, and he was not on the "lost" list.  I sent them
an email,
asking that if they had an address for my friend, could they please
forward my
contact information to him?  And I just heard back from the University
yesterday.  They have a current address for him and they have forwarded
my
information!

The thought of being in contact again with this person just thrills me
to no
end.  He's just one of those people you can't ever forget.  It may be
that he
has no desire to re-establish contact with me, and might be inclined to
look at
me as a weirdo, like I looked at the guy who tried to contact me.  I
dont' know
what to say except that it was something I needed to do.  We'll see.  I
feel
that my expectations have already dwindled, just since beginning this
message. 

Julie