TheBanyanTree: Dating (Pam)

[anita at redpepper.net.au]

Oh Pam, that sucks. I'm sorry that happened. On the positive side, it does
show that there are men that can enjoy a woman's company for more than just
the purpose of jumping into bed, but that doesn't help if you have feelings.
. 

Your potted history of your marriage was very interesting. I am of the view
that there is no such thing as a perfect relationship, just varying levels
of what one is willing to put up with in terms of dissatisfaction (violence
or any kind of abuse of course being different and definitely immediate
grounds for termination). One of my oldest friends has a habit of throwing
relationships out the door for all sorts of reasons including boredom, and
others have been together since forever and seem fairly happy about it.

Phil and I have had (and still have) our ups and downs but there is mostly
good at this point (and my expectations changed markedly a few years ago
when we went through that crap with the other woman). I can't say that I've
ever met my soul mate, and have only really had two serious long-term
relationships in my life. I can't imagine ever doing it again if Phil and I
separated. I'm too damn lazy. I listen to the dating stories relayed by my
single friends and frankly would rather have a wine alone and watch Netflix.
I hardly get enough time to see my actual friends, time is precious!

I love the volunteer work you do and think I'd probably rather do something
fulfilling like that than take on an aging partner who is going to need
support right as my kids head into independence. Is that terrible? 

But I do also remember feeling alone when I was single, even with a cat,
so...maybe I would make the effort. 

I'm raising a glass of beer to you and hoping you find what you are looking
for.

Anita
xxx

-----Original Message-----
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Message: 1
Date: Sat, 28 Jan 2023 10:31:58 -0500
From: Pam James <pamjamesagain at gmail.com>
To: "A comfortable place to meet other people and exchange your own
	*original* writings." <thebanyantree at lists.remsset.com>
Subject: TheBanyanTree: This Turned Out to be Much Longer Than I'd
	Planned and I May or May Not Have Ever Made a Point
Message-ID:
	<CAJbY3PPoU6g8mAVvcn1F_0VeYX3aggQ8QaQmUHDriJBqYrc4Dw at mail.gmail.com>
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