TheBanyanTree: [External] Re: a real life adventure involving dogs

[LaLinda]

Pam. You're my hero. I'm so thankful you've uncovered your gifts.

Steve and I were talking about this in the car the other day...I often feel
good-for-nothing, anymore, and he scolded me and told me I've always done a
lot for ppl, which I don't recall. I've always been a helper, and not
necessarily a healthy one, due to codeoendent crud, alcoholic oarents,
such, so, probably, the bottom line is, whatever good I may have done, I
never felt was good enough, but, LOL! THAT MAY JUST COME FROM GROWING UP IN
A FAMILY OF IRISH CULTURE!  OMG, I'm afraid it's true. Yikes. I made a
promise to myself when I was a teenager and that was to be the opposite of
most adults I knew.  That wasn't hard, my personality was so different,
they'd ask me what was wrong with me! I was "too nice."

You're a fighter, Pam, and when you lock onto something, you follow
through. I'm so happy you are out there doing what needs to be done. I
guess what *I* can do is send pursuers for you and your work. It's
important, the most important, and I'm glad you have a sweet dog family.

Linda

On Wed, Aug 14, 2019, 8:40 AM Pam James <pamjamesagain at gmail.com> wrote:

> I am finding in my more mature age, as I find out more about myself, that I
> am a champion for underdog dogs, and kids!!  I don't know if this is
> something new, or something that has been there all along, just tamped down
> and hidden while I was busy growing up, and divorcing husbands, and raising
> kids!
>
> My last husband and I had two Danes.  When we split, he took the puppy and
> I kept the 4 year old.  We lived together and I left her whenever and
> somewhere along the line, we seriously bonded.  And when she died, I was
> devastated!!  I finally, and truly GOT IT!!  Before that, while I had owned
> some part of some dogs, I hadn't had that bond, and when they died, I was
> removed from the sadness.  But with Annie, I was THERE.  And I felt it in
> my bones.  It was such an eye-opening moment!!  So then I got Axel, my
> first rescue.  And he came with a whole barrel of issues and I loved that
> dog from my soul!!  We went about everywhere together!  And if I couldn't
> take him - he hated other dogs! - I wouldn't go!!  He would sit in my car
> motionless, and focus on the door I went into, waiting for me to come back
> out!!  I'd leave the car unlocked and the A/C on in the summer, but I'd
> take him with me because he hated to be left alone!
>
> We had three amazing years together, and then he too died on me...  I lost
> a part of myself when I lost him, but I had a hole to fill and I knew that
> there was another dog out there needing a mom, so I immediately got my next
> rescue!  Bo is a major pain in my ass!!  Totally undisciplined (only partly
> my fault!), out of control hyper, he's on meds and still chews stuff -
> going long periods in between until I let down my guard and leave something
> unattended!!!  He is not graceful and he has no respect for anybody's
> personal space!!  But this dog... <sigh>  because he can be so hard to
> love, I love him more!!  We rescued another Dane - she's deaf! - but she's
> company for him.  He can't go with  me because he will NOT sit still and
> nothing is safe in my car, so!  They aren't necessarily close, but they
> coexist and that's the most I can hope for at this point!!
>
> And the children...  Because of my own childhood, I made sure my kids
> didn't have the same experiences.  Their parents divorced when they were
> very young, but they never heard an argument regarding their custody or who
> had who when!  We shared and adjusted according to what was best for the
> kids!!  So yes, okay, I admit it!  I take a lot of pride in knowing that!
> And now they are grown up and moving on with own lives - both productive
> members of society taking their own roads to their futures!  (Neither
> appears to have any intentions of gifting me with grandchildren, but those
> are their choices and I can't question them.  I wouldn't ever have
> tolerated anybody questioning mine!!!)
>
> And so I have taken to champion children thru our County's Guardian ad
> Litem program.  A friend suggested it and I said 'yes'!  And I have never
> looked back!  As it turns out, I"m kind of good at this!  I am not perfect
> at this, but I feel like it's a real calling!  I've got seven cases and
> thirteen kids right now who need a loud-mouthed old broad to speak for them
> in court and protect them from crazy and/or addicted and/or negligent
> parents!!!  I have a very low tolerance for bullshit, and I am more than
> happy to call them on it.  Thank goodness those nice social workers balance
> us out!!
>
> Anyway.... this started with dogs and the crazy love we have for the
> creatures... but then it turned into all about ME!!  :-)
>
> p.s... for those wondering about Clifford, the little rat dog that I
> inherited:  my neighbor's daughter and son-in-law basically took him out of
> my arms when they found out that he hadn't gone to the home he was supposed
> to go to before I inherited him!  They had fallen in love with his picture
> and they had in-laws who had lost a little puppy and a father who was dying
> and little children who loved him and they were beside themselves to
> forgive any of his flaws so that they could take him home... and so they
> did!!  He is happily spoiled and surrounded by many who love him.  And
> nobody to step on him!!
>
>
> On Tue, Aug 13, 2019 at 4:28 PM Teague, Julie Anna <jateague at indiana.edu>
> wrote:
>
> > Hahahahaaa.  I get your subtext.  I, too, was a cat-only person for 57
> > years of my life.  I love cats.  I understand cats, as much as anyone CAN
> > understand cats.  But life is funny that way.  Sometimes I make decisions
> > that make no sense to my head, but total sense to my heart.   After my
> > beloved Skittles passed away, and even though I've had a lifetime of
> sweet
> > cats, I felt like no other cat could ever replace her.  She was the cat
> of
> > all cats.  I cried for weeks after she passed.  And even though I missed
> > having a fur baby, I couldn't look at other cats, not even many months
> > later.  It hurt my heart. Then my mom started looking for a small dog,
> and
> > I started helping her look.  Not for me, you understand, because I'm a
> cat
> > person. I knew a dog would complicate my life.  I knew I didn't have any
> > experience with house breaking or training a dog.  I knew they barked and
> > slobbered and needed a hundred times more attention than the average cat.
> > And then I met Tansy and my heart sproinge
> >  d and I brought her home.  She is all of the above--an ill-trained (my
> > fault), attention-seeking (again, probably my fault), pain in the tuckus
> > (I'm not taking all the blame here), but the universe knew I needed this
> > dog in my life.  I love her beyond reason.  I work from home more, just
> so
> > I can be home with my dog.  I have given up any possibility of having a
> > lunch hour, except when the husband pitches in ever so occasionally.
> I've
> > passed on dinner invitations because I'd been away from my dog all day
> and
> > knew she missed me. I have less time and  less money, but I have so much
> > more love.  I  still don't know if I'm gung-ho a dog person, although I
> > have much more understanding of dogs and why people love them.  I'd say I
> > like all other dogs more, now, than I ever did.  But I flat out love my
> > dog.  Love her. Can't imagine my life without her.
> >
> > And poor Perkins, he is a pretty good little dog most of the time.  He
> had
> > a really bad day on Sunday, for sure.  He's had other really bad days.
> He
> > was six months old when my mom got him from his foster home where he'd
> been
> > kenneled for way too much of the time, because she had too many foster
> > animals and Perkins had special needs.  We don't know what happened to
> him
> > when he was younger, but it couldn't have been good.  He is so fearful of
> > so many things, especially men (how could I not understand THAT), small
> > children, joggers, cyclists, and coming through doors.  But he's ever so
> > slowly coming around.  He loves my mom, he loves me as a second mom, and
> he
> > loves Tansy most of all.  As obnoxious as he can be, I feel for him and
> try
> > to be kind and calm with him to help him through his fears a bit more
> each
> > time he's here.  I even talked to my mom about yelling at him.  She tends
> > to get shrill sometimes, and I reminded her that I'd read that dogs
> aren't
> > not obeying because they don't
> >  HEAR you.  They hear you loud and clear.  And it turns out that Perkins
> > comes better now that I've convinced her to keep a calm, quiet voice with
> > him.
> >
> > Anyway, that's how this cat person ended up with a dog.  Don't know yet
> if
> > I'd ever have another one, but I am one hundred percent nuts about THIS
> > dog.
> >
> > Julie
> >
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: TheBanyanTree <thebanyantree-bounces at lists.remsset.com> On Behalf
> > Of tobie at shpilchas.net
> > Sent: Tuesday, August 13, 2019 12:46 PM
> > To: A comfortable place to meet other people and exchange your own
> > *original* writings. <thebanyantree at lists.remsset.com>
> > Cc: thebanyantree at remsset.com
> > Subject: [External] Re: TheBanyanTree: a real life adventure involving
> dogs
> >
> > This message was sent from a non-IU address. Please exercise caution when
> > clicking links or opening attachments from external sources.
> > -------
> >
> > I like cats
> >
> > > On Aug 13, 2019, at 6:49 AM, Teague, Julie Anna <jateague at indiana.edu>
> > wrote:
> > >
> > > A good friend of mine who blogs daily issued a blog challenge for
> August
> > to write on "Action and Adventure".  Rather bad timing for me in that the
> > first half of my year, and especially July, was chock-a-block full of
> > travel and adventures, and in August I really wanted to stay home, piddle
> > around the house, work in the garden, go to the farmer's market.  I
> craved
> > a little domesticity.  So spending time with the dogs is pretty much all
> > I've done so far in August, outside of the daily job, which is cranking
> up
> > in preparation for the 48K university students about to descend upon us.
> > Fortunately, there is never a dull moment with mygoofy canines.  I have
> one
> > single, tiny, four and a half pound Yorkie named Tansy, but I often keep
> > Perkins, my mom's rescued, half-priced, slightly emotionally damaged
> Parti
> > Yorkie. My mom can't resist a half price sale. (A Parti Yorkie is
> basically
> > a white Yorkie with strange fluffy, knotty hair.) I brought Perkins home
> > with me last weekend. My f!
> >  olk
> > > s would
> > > come on Sunday, spend the night, and take Perkins home with them Monday
> > morning.  Most of the week was fine (no, really, it was FINE) except for
> > Tansy's nearly-choking-to-death incident with the leashes. (I'm realizing
> > I'm several story sharings behind in this venue.) So, the choking
> incident
> > and then Perkins was almost attacked by a mother deer because he kept
> > approaching and barking and she was protecting her baby.  Mother deer was
> > moving aggressively towards him, ready to kick some ass as I yanked him
> in
> > the other direction.  Even though I live in town in Bloomington, a few
> > blocks from the city center, we have many, many deer in the neighborhood,
> > most of them having produced fawns this Spring. We'd all lived through
> > those adventures, but then there was Sunday.
> > >
> > > Sunday morning at 6:15 to be exact.  There I was lying in bed with the
> > two dogs, trying desperately for a few more minutes of sleep.  Husband
> was
> > in Florida where he loves to go but I do not.  I'm sure he was
> experiencing
> > some really good sleep, though, which made me a little jealous. Perkins
> > looked out the bedroom window at that wee hour and saw a large rabbit in
> > the back yard.  He leapt off the bed and ran to the door.  I let him out,
> > because he probably had to pee anyway, and he was never going to catch
> the
> > rabbit.  I'd recently blocked a rabbit hole under the fence with a rock
> to
> > keep rabbits out (not effective), so the rabbit ran to that spot to
> escape,
> > hit the rock instead, bounced off, and ran across the yard the other way,
> > with Perkins in hot pursuit.
> > >
> > > Well, something snapped in Perkins' acorn-sized Yorkie brain.  He'd
> seen
> > rabbits before when we were out on the leash, but he'd never gotten very
> > close.  It's as if he finally got the scent, and he went insane.  He
> hunted
> > and barked and howled and ran under all the plants in my gardens for 45
> > minutes, getting mud-covered in the process.  I finally got hold of him
> to
> > try to calm him down, and I gave him a sink bath to clean him up.  But he
> > was still insane, scratching at the doors and windows, whining and
> barking
> > to be let back out. An hour of that passed and I was about to pull my
> hair
> > out, so I let him out again.  The rabbit was long gone, but  he repeated
> > the insanity for maybe another half an hour, until I once again chased
> him
> > down and repeated the sink bath.  I felt sorry for the neighbors with all
> > the barking, and Perkins has a particularly shrill bark. It goes directly
> > to the center of the inner ear like a sharp knife.   This time I took
> both
> > dogs out for a walk aft!
> >  er
> > > his bath
> > > , thinking he'd get his mind off of the rabbit.  There usually aren't
> > rabbits in the park, so we walked there.  It is normal for Perkins to pee
> > 45 times on every walk.  Not this time.  Not once.  He just ran around
> the
> > park like a dog possessed, sniffing for rabbits.  I was agog at his
> powers
> > of concentration, since I'd never seen an inkling of concentrated effort
> in
> > him before.
> > >
> > > I took him home, listened to more shrill barking, piteous whining, and
> > incessant scratching at the doors and windows.  I tried distracting him
> > with treats.  I gave him a time out in the front bedroom where it's quiet
> > and darkish.  I tried holding him.  He was not to be soothed.  He
> couldn't
> > let it go.  After the third hunt around the yard-yes, I let him out again
> > because I knew he had to pee and poop at some point-and the third sink
> > bath, and the third round of barking and howling at the door, I finally
> > locked him in the front bedroom again for a bit.  He hadn't even stopped
> > for food or water this whole time.  I'm telling you, the dog was off the
> > deep end.  Finally, finally, SIX HOURS after this all began, I got him
> calm
> > enough to lie on the bed with Tansy and me. Tansy hadn't been able to get
> > her morning nap because of all of this, and she was so tired she could
> > hardly keep her eyes open.  She'd been growling at Perkins from her perch
> > on the sofa while Perkins ran around !
> >  los
> > > ing his
> > > shit for six hours.  But, we got on the bed, Tansy collapsed and closed
> > her little eyes, and Perkins propped his chin on my leg so that he could
> > still see out the window (even though I'd closed the blinds). As his eyes
> > drooped he let out one last shrill bark, and Tansy's eyes popped back
> open
> > and locked with mine.  We were completely sympatico.  We were both over
> > this barking maniac.   At last Perkins could fight it no longer and fell
> > asleep for five or ten minutes. This seemed to reboot his pea brain and
> he
> > was very normal after that.  When I say reboot, it was literally as if
> I'd
> > unplugged him and plugged him back in. Sheesh.  By the time Perkins'
> people
> > came for him, I was pretty much a basket case.
> > >
> > > And this, in a nutshell, was Sunday.
> > >
> > >
> > > Julie Anna Teague
> > >
> > >
> > > Want to change your name, email address, or password? Or have you
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> >
> > "Out of sight; out of mind."   old proverb
> >
> > "Absence makes the heart grow fonder."  Old proverb
> >
> > "Nothing to see here, folks! Keep moving!"   Anonymous to Anonymouses
> >
> >
> > Tobie Shapiro
> > mailto:tobie at shpilchas.net <mailto:tobie at shpilchas.net>
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
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