TheBanyanTree: My hate affair with forms: the acid test

[Dale M. Parish]

Jim Miller rote:

> Also, you inspired me in another area; over the last 13 years, I've
> completed endless forms for medical institutions and the stream of
> specialist I've been introduced to. I've always hated forms.

Reminds me painfully of a time about 15 years ago when I was supposed
to have a minor cyst removed by my family doctor of 30 years.  He
called the hospital and set it up as an out-patient procedure, then he
told me to go on out to the hospital and fill out the preadmittance
forms and he'd meet me there in the morning.  

I went out to the hospital and filled out forms for 45 minutes.  It
was getting close to quitting time for normal people, and the nurse
gave me what she said was the last one-- an accordian folded
continuous form that was eight pages long, front and back, on which
were paragraph after paragraph of places to initial and at the very
bottom of the last page, to sign.  I'd already irritated her by
reading most of what I signed before I signed it.   She told me that I
only needed to initial the paragraphs she'd highlighted in yellow, and
she begrudgingly told me I could read it all if I wanted and then sign
it, fold it and put it on top the stack, and she'd be down the hall if
I needed her. 

I read page after page of statements like, "I understand that
amputation of my eyeball may impair my sight." and "I understand that
removal of my uterus, ovaries and cervix may cause my inability to
bear children," etc, ad nausium.  I finally finished, and at the bottom
of the signature sheet were four blank lines for "patient comments"
and my signature block.  I wrote on the comments, "I abhor lawyers,"
and signed it, folded it back up, and put it on the top of the stack.
The nurse was down the hall, and she told me that they'd see me in the
morning, and I could go, which I did.

About 10 that night, the hospital called me to cancel my procedure the
next morning.  They could not allow me on the premises with that
comment on my form.  It was two weeks before they would reschedule
me.  Go figure.  

Hugs,
Dale


--
Dale M. Parish
628 Parish Rd
Orange TX 77632
(409) 745-3899