TheBanyanTree: Taking care of our parents

[ForTheLoveOfSoftware.com]

My mother, who has a nice retirement, has lived with my brother, who has a
lot of money for about 12 years. He furnishes her with a suite of rooms so
she can come and go as she pleases, have guests, etc. and they can all have
their own privacy. He provides her with a car, buys all the groceries and
pays all other living expenses. In 12 years, it has never occured to me to
thank him or to see if I can be of assistance. Even worse, it has never
occured to me to thank his wife.
 This month my mother-in-law came to live with us and I love her dearly. My
husband and I were shocked to find out all the things an "old" person needs.
His mother does not have a large retirement, she lives with a son who has
sugar diabetes and cannot always work. If you have an "old" person you love
in your life, try to be aware of what they need and offer it without making
them ask for it.
 Mom, my mother-in-law, needed a steady supply of Depends, Jergens hand
lotion, Calcium supplements, bras, etc. She has never owned a CD player, I
bought her a little $20.00 portable one and 2 CDs. She has played them
non-stop for 2 weeks. I bought her a faux mink coat, she held it and rubbed
it the whole day. She is grateful for every thing you do for her. She tries
to stay out of the way and never complains. I would go on about what "we
bought for her and what we did for her," but that is not the point. The
point is, she loves being with us because we love being with her. When Mom
got here she was so timid she hardly came out of her room. Now, she is
letting me teach her how to crochet in the evenings.
 She has three daughters who live within walking distance of her house. She
should be clean and have the things she needs. She doesn't need lots of
material things, but she needs to be looked after. Please don't let your
mother or father go on a trip with a suitcase full of dirty cloths. If you
are poor and you see your mother has a blouse with a hole in it, sew a
flower over the hole. If she or he need Depends, be sure the county, city or
someone is giving her or him enough so that they can change every time they
go to the bathroom and no just once a day. Depends has an online delivery
service. If you live close, be sure the bedsheets get changed and washed
once a week.
 Remember, you may be depending on someone to care for you some day. As you
give, so shall you receive. And remember to thanks those who are taking on
the responsibility.

--
Sandi Grandberry M.Ed.