TheBanyanTree: My Turn

[NancyIee at aol.com]

The only thing scarier than one's own death, as Margaret said, is the slow, 
almost intentional death of someone you love,  . . and you can't do anything 
about it.

About one who, though way overweight and with multiple major medical 
problems, insists on doing things surely to shorten her life. Cholesterol high?, eat 
two marinated pork chops. Diabetes?  Forget your insulin at home on a weekend 
trip, and try to juggle with orange juice and fasting, then having ice cream 
and pie. Being ordered by one's doctor to lose weight, and going out to dinner 
and ordering the richest meal on the menu.

And I . . . . I have to stand by and watch while this dearest friend in the 
world destroys herself.

I can't nag. I'm already a nag: did you test your sugar this 
morning/afternoon/evening? That seems awfully rich to eat right now. Lets cook at home and 
have veggies. I don't feel like going to the steak house tonight. Let's take a 
walk, we've watched this old movie before and we need the exercise.  No, I don't 
have any ice cream/candy/cake/pie.  Okay, I'll shut up, I know I'm nagging. I 
just don't want to lose you.

I know I will, and much sooner than I want to. She's already had heart 
attacks, she goes numb from diabetes, she loses weight by the half-ounce. She is my 
best friend and if I believed in soul-mates, she'd be 'it'.

I think I fear my own death less. I know it will hurt.


NancyLee